When Your Loved Ones Make Challenging Choices (Part 2)
Welcome back to the second half of our series on handling the difficult decisions made by those close to you. Whether it’s an unhealthy habit, a choice in partners, or a concerning lifestyle. Last time we talked about how you have control primarily over your own actions and feelings, but you can use these to communicate sincerely and reconnect with your loved ones and help them see your point of view.
Communicating Differently to Break Bad Patterns
Even if you think you’ve hit a deadlock on discussing the situation, the block may be more related to how you’ve been discussing it. Changing your communication patterns with your loved one can sometimes help to make it clear that you really want to talk, but don’t want to fight. You might want to start differently, with something like “I want to talk about this, but I want to hear you out, too.” then suggest taking turns and give them their turn first if they want it. This can help create a more open discussion about their decisions. If you’re worried about the talk ending in shouting, make sure to keep your voice calm and don’t be afraid to ask for a moment to cool off if you start to feel upset.
Empowerment Through Therapy
It’s a common misconception that those with ‘the problem’ are the ones that should try counseling, but that is not always the case. If you are struggling with a difficult emotional situation, often the responsible thing to do is acknowledge that you’re getting overwhelmed and seek advice from someone who can offer guidance. Therapy can help you refocus your energy back onto what you can control, handling that your loved one’s decisions are their own while exploring what you can do to make a difference.
Once you’ve accepted responsibility only for your own actions, you can begin to rebuild the strained relationship with your loved one. While you may or may not be able to change their mind, being open will help them understand that you only want what’s best for them. If you have been struggling with the decisions or behaviors of a loved one and need someone to talk to, contact us soon.